SOME PEOPLE NEVER LEARN
I’m driving across town the other day when this guy in his cool new ride pulls up alongside me at a stop light. He seems to be in a hurry because he doesn’t bother to stop in the right place but rolls right past me and stops in the crosswalk where he blocks two women and a guy in a wheelchair who now have to go around him, but he doesn’t care. I’m guessing he probably does this all the time. When the light changes he goes pedal to the metal and leaves me in the dust. I drive on at the lawful speed like I always do and, well how do you like that? There he is, waiting for me at the next stop light. Ever notice how much that happens? This time he shoots me a dirty look and once again races away with the green light. You probably know what’s coming.
The same thing happens no fewer than seven times as we cross town together. Each time we stop, look at each other, he gives me a dirty look, then races out of sight at full throttle but there I am right behind or alongside him at the next light. I’m trying hard to keep a straight face but this time he catches me in his rear view mirror laughing at him. Now he’s really pissed, decides he’s had enough and goes into road rage mode. This time he stays put through the green light so I can’t go. I remember this trick from my stupid kid days in L.A. when we did dumb stuff like that so I’m watching my mirrors pretty close, hoping I don’t get rear ended. Then when the light goes yellow for us he flips me the single digit salute and smokes through the intersection nearly causing a four-car pileup and then disappears around a curve. I’m thinking, well, this time he pulled it off, but nope.
The next time I see him, he and his ride are at the curb and he’s getting an in-your-face earful from one really angry deputy sheriff. I give him a friendly wave on the way by but I don’t think he sees me.
This is not about learning to drive, This is about staying alive! See you next time . . . I hope!